i do not condone bathtub ky wrestling
just put cider in my bong. gotta love fall
Dude she has a fucking rock collection. Never will I ever talk to her again.
why do all canadians talk like horny gerbils are stuck in their throats?
I'm eating lunch next to a table of beautiful culturally-diverse women chattering away happily. It's like sitting next to a Yaz commercial.
As I was going down on her I noticed she had a tatoo on her inner thigh that said "Eat it like your birthday cake".
I'm in new territory... I've never had to convince a guy to let me give him head as an apology.
He pretended my clit ring was a door knocker.
Found a Safeway Deli Sandwich in the shower this morning... Perhaps the 9th beer was unnecessary.
I walked in on her just letting her nose bleed into her friend's hands
Our neighbors just passed us a blunt from their deck, and are hooking us up.
I just baked them cookies. We're friends now.
Walking out of our apartment this morning to go to class, I saw a sticky note on the front door that said "get tested." The door was unlocked so did you bring some stranger back last night? I'm assuming you weren't referring to me...
We spent a good 10 minutes in the morning looking for my clothes. I ended up taking the bus home in my 6inch heels and his baggy t-shirt. The bus was filled with kids... one of them whistled at me.
I just wanna be like "dude your gf's on a porn site" but i just dont know if i have the heart.
On the flip side Weston asked if he could move me to Wisconsin to be his "moto hoe" which is actually a thing apparently
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