I reminded them that I didn't puke and I cleaned yours up! So huh!
Shes from jersey what did you expect her to say when you asked her if she did coke? Its like asking some1 from a third world country if they are hungry
I'm not a creep or anything, just a lost soul looking for a good lay
How fortunate humanity is that it need not rely on the female orgasm for procreation
Your "OraGel will numb anything" theory was the worst thing I ever believed in.
I just realized that my phone was set to Brazilian time...what the fuck happened last night
You took a bar mat shot.
Just had a tranny complement my outfit. Looks like I'll have to change before we go out.
So I fucked her. If you're keeping score at home, it's all tied up with horrible sex with someone I like and great sex with someone I hate both with 1.
Wrapped in a blanket, just ate a whole party pizza. All my dreams are coming true and you don't even care.
Congratulations, you've begun to unfuck your life.
sex on a roof was cool and all but that superhero argument was the best part of the night hands down
WEED BROWNIES! He put weed in my brownie mix! And he got it from YYYYOOOOUUUU!
Look at the bright side mom. After 20 years dad is still capable of surprising you!
Shut up Max.
Yeah come over whenever. Weed gets here at 8.
I'll be there at 7:59.
I don't know what that means but it's making me want to fuck you.
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