My bad bro. I had no idea that when i suggested our triva team name be my last abortion tickled, that she would bring up cancun. Stay strong i think she really liked you
Apparently 151 is to me what spinach is to popeye.
I'm ready for my liver to be the last casualty of 2009
that last vodka shot was definitely the straw that broke the camels alcohol tolerance level
i wrote her a fucking poem. i better get laid for that
You want to move to a city because of their promotional beer pricing
So?
This is why you shouldn't make decisions
Hypothetical question: If a guy wanted to watch you fuck me, would you be willing to take a long lunch break on Wednesday?
He just lit his joint with the tiki torches around his pool. He is definitely coming to my future parties
I let a naked juice spill down my leg for like 30 minutes bc i thought i was hallucinating that my leg was cold.
Jesus told me in my dream not to go to the party. I am athiest for tonight PARTY ON
Are we talking about who knows if I'll get naked pictures of you with a broadsword or who knows if I'll be surprised?
Nothing bad can happen when you have a kiwi flavored condom. Absolutely nothing.
You said you wanted to wrap his dick in a tortilla and make a spicy burrito. Let me just say, most girls don't have this hard of a time getting laid.
Please tell me that chemistry equipment is for chemistry and not for producing felonies.
I'm like a saiyan, every time I get trashed I come back stronger
Randomize
