you didnt say anything until i brought it up today. i guess i misjudged your maturity.
I guess I misjudged your gender.
i just went dwnstairs and there are 5 guys without their shirts on hugging each other. i think i should leave now
You ruined his night from a different state? Impressive.
Frozen waffles and wine. Loneliness-party of one
I'm afraid to text her because most of the time she just replies with "cockblock."
Walk-of-shaming home in that dress you got arrested in. Six guys called out your name when I walked past. I've never been more proud of us.
I'm still not completely convinced I'm not pregnant. I just dipped beef jerky in cream cheese frosting.
I sang again at the bar lastnight I don't think alanis morrset knew when she wrote you outta know that the drunk version was going to be go fuck yourself Josh and Chelsea. I love $2 wells.
she was braiding my hair and singing forever young while she vommed everywhere at the same time. Talent.
Rule #61 of being a lady: never get fingered by a finger with a knuckle tattoo
Well sure, my hetero side is thrilled, but my gay side is soooo judging
I just want the relationship Bob and Linda Belcher have- is that too much to ask?!
I just ordered $70 worth of pizza and I'm not even ashamed. Happy Valentine's Day to me.
I had no plans to sleep with him, but he had to stay because of the snow. I always say, don't look a gift storm in the mouth.
long story short, he tried to fuck me standing up, toppled over, and now I have four stitches next to my eye
Randomize
