You supply the liquor and I'll "accidently" forget my bathing suit.
Deal!
we'll penetrate his innocence with our dicks
My cleaning lady broke my bubbler. It's awkward between us now.
Why?
Because she knows I do drugs and I know she's a clumsy bitch.
There's an australian, my relationship has no hope.
You're so wise. You're like my sexual Grandmother Willow.
Do you remember puking up your retainer into the toilet and putting it right back in your mouth?
Just quiet vomiting, and in between heaves she mumbled "be the pro"
dude, apparently i tried to force feed my grandma bananas last night.
$100 bras are my way of telling my boobs that I love and appreciate them, and all the metaphorical doors they have opened for me.
Dude I've kinda accepted I may leave Nola with the clap.
Can you pick me up a bottle of make-an-ass-of-myself tonight?
Do you want cuervo gold or silver?
As part of the off-hours team building exercises, I had my new coworkers figure out to push me back to the hotel from the nearby bars in a shopping cart every night for a week.
We are back but we are listening to stairway to heaven in my car. Amy is air drums. Be back when it's over.
Wanna buy a dildo with me during your lunch break tomorrow?
She calls him the walking dildo to his face. That relationship is already fucked up.
Randomize
