i need a penis for penetration, you wont do.
oh yeah... my b.
I think I'm going to die by hangover. I'm in my spanish class. So I guess I'm going to be muerte.
She was kinda tragic... like a puppy that runs into things. Cute but really stupid. So, yeah, I hit it.
..i think i can hear you losing your virginity
I have minimal recognition and a lot of burns on my tongue and my vagina hurts.
You get drunk and try to bury your girlfriend in the sand JUST ONCE and all hell breaks loose
I'm to the point that I've had the revelation that its physically impossible for my arms to be attached to my torso.
While I appreciate the pity sex (seriously, THANK YOU) we should not do it 3feet away from my ex when he's passed out next time. Awkward.
My roommates don't agree with the whole tv in the bathroom idea. Fucking barbarians.
pretty sure I blew his mind with the sex last night. He repaid me with a five minute conversation about power rangers.
You guys go ahead and have your romantic night. I'm gonna keep my vday tradition alive of angry banging a stranger.
I'm going to be such a slut in Europe I've already decided
Send me dick pics. We'll make a scrap book
I was cock-blocked by a swat team last night.
He saw me naked after our first date and still asked for a second.. so I think we’re doing good
I may or may not be drunker than time right now.
Randomize