ok think of it like jelly beans. if you can learn to like the licorice ones, youll always have lots of them because no one else wants them. its the same with fat chicks
this may or may not be the weed talking, but this is by far the best tasting toothpaste i've ever had
and that's when the elephants and penises started dancing on the ceiling
I think in growing up..I've been having a hard time masterbating to fictional characters
What? Cold floors are soothing when you have a hangover. How am I supposed to pass that up. Even if I'm at my parents house
He had in his status he loved beating off and tagged his wife. another reason facebook should be for college.
Contrary to what peaches says, you can't fuck the pain away. Full story later. Have a good morning, buddy.
Literally passed out while tubing... Boating while hammered is a blast but thank God for life jackets
Yeah well my vagina has expectations too but they don't get met all the time.
I called my dad at 3 a.m. because I thought he'd be proud that I didnt get arrested. Daddys little girl at her finest...
How was your weekend?
The sex was so good. It hurts to exist.
I just took the batteries out of the xbox remote so she could replace the dead ones in her vibrator If that's not love I don't know what is
Sooo, did you delete me cause I said I wouldn't babysit you while you did shrooms? You're a grown man.
The good thing about country bars is that the men generally look like men. The bad thing is the country music.
Taco Bell is better for you than cocaine, I promise.
Randomize
