My little sister just found a condom in her bag i borrowed... Happy fourteenth birthday.
so high. i feel like my whole body is a boner
im having a threesome with these popsicles
i'm having a wet tshirt contest with myself and yet i'm still losing
I just looked at the maps icon on my IPhone and "eR" was typed in the search address bar. I wonder if we ever got there.
I mean its cheating, but i figure i've made out wiht married chicks before so its like a nicotine patch, quitting by doing less and less each day
I've got to admit, I'm a little hesitant about giving him road head. I've seen how he drives and I've seen how he acts when I give him head. A small part of me is saying this is going to end badly.
After owing so much in back child support they should make vasectomy a mandatory
Cheez-its and a bottle of cab...for under $10 you could win this girls heart
In unrelated news guys should not ask what I'm doing/wearing if they can't handle an honest answer. I'm not pretending I'm not sitting on the couch in yoga pants watching Community so you can beat off.
I just bout myself an edible arrangement for myself and had it delivered to work. I even wrote myself a note. This is a new low for me.
There comes a point where there's just condoms and old mcdonalds in your garbage can and you can't tell if you've won or lost.
For real his Facebook page says he studied "sexual arts" at some random college I've never heard of. You've been warned.
Dude, some chick came over here earlier and thought my lube was hand sanitizer. She poured it all over her hands.
I just don’t understand what sort of USPS worker wants to take my unitard and sex toys.
Randomize