No it only became awkward when she walked in with her new boyfriend and we realized we'd all banged her
I figured it out. hungover me hates drunk me, drunk me hates sober me, and sober me hates being sober. so yes, were blacking out tonight.
Married on the beach in PCB while blackout drunk. Bonged beers on the sandbar for a bachelor party. They shotgunned beers at the end of the vows. How is spring break allowed to happen?
Just took a final in the room where I lost my virginity. I think it was god luck.
Pretending to be straight requires way more energy than I'm willing to use in this heat.
you don't seem to understand just how much pasta i spilled on my bed last night.
I need to stop drunkenly getting naked. I'm losing all my favorite party clothes.
sometimes when you're high at work you just have to say fuck it and eat the dog treats
In the future, could you not call me 'bro' while we're having sex?
Is it bad that I want a job purely so I can buy drugs with without feeling like I am sacrificing my future?
Why do you think I have a job?
When she tells her friend, "hey I'll be back tomorrow, just going to fuck a guy", right in front of you, you know you've got a winner.
We celebrated Cinco the right way. We took shots of 1800 then he fucked me while Selena was on TV in the background
I don’t know what he is but he sure can suck a lollipop.
MDMA, margaritas, mashed potatoes and ice cream aren't keto Kristin
my mom is feeding me weed brownies...god help us
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