I am slurping my drink like I am going to the electric chair
yo my bday is less then one week away. hope youve found another annoying candian i can lick dairy products off of. also sorry about your loss
They keep asking what you are doing. I told them to quit calling her "what."
Just cleaned up my puke with my lecture notes.
if he only knew that in between each sext i was puking.
you started keeping track of only every even numbered drink you had
The worst part was I wasn't conscious enough to move out of the way, I knew i was being puked on but I couldn't move.
What time do you think you'll be heterosexual?
i'm almost positive she was a dude but like it doesn't even matter
re read what you just said
2:23 am. Im just at McDonalds, in my pajamas, at 2 am, paying in nickles, cuz thats how i roll.
2:26 am. Im just being thrown out of McDonalds, in my pajamas, at 2 am, without my nickles, cuz thats how i roll.
By the way, do you realize that you asked me how much you could get for your eggs last night. And once you learned the price said that you had plenty to share.
As pissed as she was, you would've thought I was trying to get back into his pants instead of his booze collection.
I'll just go on tinder. Seeking strong male to help take apart ikea furniture and move. I'll touch your dick.
hooked up with him and then had a conversation with his ex about how we hate people who hook up with our exs...
Fucked a DJ on a jetski today... I love florriidaaa!
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