This is much more drunk than i was intending for a wednesday
fireball beer pong. youre missing out
how is that even possible?
ove gloves.
be there in ten.
I hope he doesn't find the chex mix when he takes my shirt off.
Can you please tell him to stop calling me ma'am? I'm starting to remember what it's like to have self respect
I could really do without pictures of your asses in my inbox. That said, I'm extremely jealous that I wasn't involved.
she was literally 3 feet away from the garbage can, said she couldn't make it, and then proceeded to vomit on the floor in front of everyone in the restaurant
Archery is over so let's go back to not giving a fuck for the next 3 years and 11 months
You blacked out and then went around stealing other peoples phones and leaving yourself voicemails
I got two from random numbers, the first was me and said "Don't forget you murdered Josh in Wii Bowling"
The second Jenn said "You are ridiculously smart for drunk dialing yourself"
There's scrapes on the inside of both my thighs.. Because we wanted to get drunk and climb trees naked.
it's all fun and games til I text you in last nights clothes with a head bleed
Dude my pants were only on for 20 minutes after she got there.
That's 30 minutes too many.
With 4 extra seconds dedicated to the dong.
These kind of text worry me.
We smoked with this guy who looked just like Hyde from that 70's show in an alley. It was a divine moment in my life.
This is my punishment for trynna have a festive time with a stranger. I always forget you can't get weird with one night stands
Got 2 free lines of blow from some random guys on the side of 13th street.....how's your Sunday going?
Randomize
