they have a walk of shame score keeper on their fridge. I marked my tally for him on my way out..
I couldn't walk, so he carried me all the way home; and then I told him that I wasn't drunk enough to fuck him. Poor kid.
if i actually bought condoms for every time i had sex, i could single handedly fix the economy
I'm not sure which one did it but one of them fucked the kink out of my neck
You could breast feed yourself wine!! This shit is genius!
You turned byob into bring your own shit show. Good work.
Why i have shady connections. Owner just txt me asking to come by and judge the new stripper.
Dude found out there's an open bar at the celebration of life thing for my grandma which is at noon. Now I know why I can drink so much
This baby is an asshole
Is it inappropriate to be Drs. Willy Fister and Jess Hewill as a couples costume for Halloween?
Oh we're gynecologists
There is a drunken, assless white chick here at this bar wearing a shirt that says "REAL WOMEN TWERK FOR JESUS". I have officially had it with our generation.
She wasn't one for labels or anything serious really but while she was riding me she yelled marry me. It's like she fucked her self into commitment lmao she realy is a keeper bro
My tits became the mascot for the SAE house last night.
Between randomly bursting into tears and the reappearance of my lost sex drive, this break up has left me bizarrely damp.
woke up hungover this morning lying in a water raft covered in water.. i dont know if i should consider this good or bad
Randomize
