Btw, I'm really high so I apologize if anything I say gets translated into arabic.
Just left a map of the Aleutian islands on this Eskimo girls face. Check one off my Alaska to do list.
I think my plan to not drink this week was just ruined by my mothers discovery of the chat function on facebook
She tased me when I walked in the door. Thought I was trying to steel her weed.
you think she would figure it out that ever dude that fucks her is just doing it bc they are in a contest to bang the fattest girl
I'm sitting by myself in my bra eating a waffle and drinking pineapple rum. gamedaaaayyyyyyy
Just had a flash back. Pretty sure i ate toilet paper last night.
just fucked two guys in less than 12 hours. i miss this part of being single.
and by single i mean slutty
I broke the girls bed. I will not apologize about bragging.
TONGUES ARE JUST MEAT TENTACLES IN OUR MOUTHS OMG
HOW ABOUT I DON'T WAKE UP TO THESE TYPES OF TEXTS
wearing the bible to the ABC party, thought you'd appreciate that.
It has gotten to a point where I just want to sit on his face. Less butterflies, more orgasms.
Yeah if I don't text back. I'm eating. sleeping. Or lifting. Or drinking. Or playing call of duty. Like shit man
she's p upset bro
Where is he. I have a sword.
i woke up on the couch at 5:24am, hangover, craving for some ribs, but i only had a bag of cheetos and a half empty beer. man what a breakfast.
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