I have a new suitor he got my # last nite... I was to tipsy to function! What was I thinking!! It's like u when u first met me
Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
when she started arguing that Girl Talk was in fact a DJ, i knew i could never sleep with her
Theyre still fighting about whether its called america or the united states.
Based on her brazillian stubble I would guess her plan had been to wait one more date before sleeping with me. Seems the plan was flexible.
i go for whatevers easier....i'm bisexual strictly due to the convenience factor
I've ID'd the nipple biter.
My bullwhip has saved my life tonight and gotten me laid. I'm gonna be Indiana Jones every Halloween!
I've never heard of anyone celebrating the holidays with a fuck buddies family before.
....I'll be expecting my trophy when I return.
I had this image of some guy in a taco truck down by the IMA accosting you for a peep show.
Just found out I called my mom at six in the morning to ask where the bong was. I win.
You know how hard it is to play cool while not drowning and appreciating a pair of butts at the same time?
Yeah I'm at work. Nothing like the threat of blowing chunks on passing cars to make you feel alive.
Yeah I either headbutted a street sign while texting or I defended you two from an evil gang of nazi muggers. I was black out so I am gonna assume it was option b.
I’m tired of his bullshit and premature ejaculation. I’m going to hotel bars and finding a guy who is DTF
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