he's going on about how he's going to treat me right and wants to let himself be in love with me and spend a lot of time together. kids these days. like its not about sex anymore. i'm confused.
spring break forecast: sunny with a chance of shitshow
Then you can skip the embarrassing can I date your ex since you're a lesbian now conversation
According to the bell hop, we stumbled in about 4 and then cannon balled into the pool.
I drunkenly asked a stripper to join our volleyball team.
Just realized that St. Patty's is on a Saturday this year in case you were interested in coming to New York and redefining bender with me.
My phone broke again .... im not really sure how im going 2 explain the teeth marks to the ppl at the Verizon store
She kicked in my bedroom door in only high-heals with a bottle of wine, announcing it was "cock-o-clock"
At first I was horrified but then he explained that he shave a "soul patch" on his balls... And I was still horrified, but I went with it.
Miscalculate d the jungle juice, it's actually 10%. Can't taste the diff anyway but my stomcha is warm. Come play pongm.
i cant believe we used adam and eve as a sexting theme last night
I just peed on a rich man's lawn fuck yeah America
It's gonna be me and some oreos tonight. Basically like sex
Homeboy just asked me to strip for him. He should not be this horny and allowed to be in Vegas with his kid.
I'm sorry I missed your birthday brunch. If it makes you feel any better I woke up wearing someone else's toga and a sombrero
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