Regardless thnx for trying to help out, I realize we are dealing w/ very stupid girls here
went to the gyno and found out that i have a birthmark on my clit. its like god gave guys a little help when it comes to getting me off.
and then he said he has been waiting since high school to touch my boobs
I only broke up with her because the ex sex is amazing. She will do ANYTHING if i even hint at getting back together
I've banged too many servicemen's wives to still be considered an American.
It's official, I need to start putting my vagina's needs before my own.
I have a weapon and I'm not blacked out. Good as gold
I just realized I'm currently not eating carbs, drinking alcohol or having sex. 2014 is off to a horrible start.
My dad just said "fuck circus"
He said he "doesnt care at all, really" if I shave my legs or not. Challenge accepted.
Fuck off. Since when do you love him??
Since he licked my arm to retrieve the macaroni and cheese he dropped. You have to appreciate that
Can't even lie. Mad respect
so after 3 days of looking i found the keg...looks like somebody tried burying behind the garage
Its mothers day... Can my present be an orgasm...for once?
When the bouncer doesn't let you in... Don't ask him where he works so you could file a complaint with the better business bureau... It only proves him right.
It's 5 PM...and you're 35. Congrats on being an amazing human being.
I would let him fuck me right here in this laundromat. Praise Satan.
Randomize
