D3 body, D1 cock
O no, u 2 are dating again?
No. I just masturbate furiously to his picture
shes the kind of girl i dont like to talk to unless my penis is in her mouth.
you know its a sad night when you can actually see and hear sitcoms on at the bar
Shark Week. Kick off begins Sunday. The drinking game has been upgraded to include jumping/breaching sharks and Jake's not allowed to bring the harpoon. Period.
Whenever you get off. By "pick me up from work" I mean, "pick me up from a bar by work at your earliest convenience" :)
I'm developing all these feelings it's disgusting.
Packing for college has become a game of where did I hide my sex toys.
If I don't quit picking up guys when I'm drunk, I'm going to need a vagina transplant.
Sooo i'm debating posing nude for the drawing and painting classes, I just wanna see if they draw my nip ring.
Oh my god I need an adult
Wait shit I am an adult
if anyone asks you the platypus in my bathtub is a gift...thats all anyone needs to know
I couldnt face her after that wonderful, terrible blowjob. Made a rope out of towels and climbed out her bathroom window.
I could be writing so much lesbian porn right now but noooooo!
I’m really upset they canceled the conference. Since the divorce I’ve been working out, I bought cute new outfits and even found a bikini I liked. Now it’s all online. You can’t get laid at a webinar
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