I let some guy put hot sauce in my asshole for his birthday
I bet her clit looks like pig in a blanket.
I thought I had fell out of his trailer but he says I tried to ninja kick his TV stand saying those girls hula hooping were trying to seduce him. There wasn't anyone else there.
Does getting a boner while watching the celtic women sing opera on ETV make me cultured?
It's confirmed. We did xmas carol the grocery store across the street from his building at 2:30am... Only the staff was there.
his grandma walked in on us. twice. and he was truly fucking surprised when i put my pants back on.
and he's drinking a bud lime in his profile pic meaning i can out drink him, meaning i would clearly be the alpha in our relationship
The front desk girl just had that condescending welcome-home-from-your-walk-of-shame face on
It was probably because you set your bra on the couter while you found your ID...
Oh aight, and i was just going to be content with drinking, beating off and watching ninja turtles
During your work shift I was either: a) stoned. b) high. c)stoned. or d) high.
I'm having a hard time existing right now. When I figure out how it works ill be over.
I know this is super early in advance but can I borrow your horse mask on 4/20
Why am I cleaning the house twerking to anaconda wearing a bears jersey and helmet?
Need to find a Santa hat to fit my penis, he deserves to be festive too.
What's the polite way to tell someone she's a grown ass woman and she needs to start acting like it.
Randomize
