I dint menn to makr ut w brtendr
Wat???
U lft me at bar, no cassh for cab, may have slept with bartender
We video chatted for almost two hours. But I woke up with puke on my keyboard. The question of the day: were we still chatting when I vommed? No idea.
Stop it. You sound like you're giving birth.
Anywhere you can eat green eggs and ham, you can have sex.
Someone just asked me to go to the dining hall for dinner and he will use one of his swipes to pay for my meal. i think this is a college version of a date
ok, my life is complete.... the cops AND the paramedic just made a Mean Girls reference...
Just rented the SCUBA equipment. Meet me at the pool to test the underwater beer bong idea.
I remember doing shots of gin, then I have this strange memory of us making out in the womens room at waffle house.
I regret none of it.
I woke up and found cookies in my purse. It's a 12/12/12 miracle.
Let's have sex in an apple orchard
I'm fucking sick of guys. I think I'm going to date myself. No drama. And I know I'll always put out.
Self reach around competition is what the Olympics has been missing all along. A true test of athleticism.
You kept crying and I couldnt help but laugh at you, I was really high though.
He bought me a bottle of Malibu. I think I could love this guy.
I've loved people for a lot less.
as a lesbian i'd like to thank joe biden and also america for giving us this absolute MILF for a VP
Randomize
