he saw my emergency pass-out-in-the-bathroom-after-drunken-puking cot in the bathroom.
You kept spitting the skittles out cause you said they tasted like "balls of sandpaper"
if i find out your the one who pierced my belly button im going to fuck your sister again
Our halfway to Halloween party needs to never happen again. There were waaayy too many wasted cartoon characters passed out in my living room this morning...
2011 senior yearbook drinking game. we're taking a shot whenever some dumbass uses that quote about how life isn't isn't about the breaths you take, but the moments that take your breath away. also that retarded wayne gretzky one about missing shots you don't take.
I was more than drunk as hell I have rug burn on my elbows from ninja roles on the ground..
You kept mumbling that you could become one with the carpet as you proceeded to give yourself the worst carpet burn I have ever seen
She has the perfect pussy. Looks like a paper cut with a puff of cotton candy on top.
So what kind of fun pills do we have for the amusement park tomorrow?
you really need to remember next time not to write your name and phone number on the paper its wrapped in.
But what if it got lost?
its illegal. you dont want people to contact you if they find it.
If I'm going to risk life and limb to wear a Wings jersey to the Garden next week, the least they can do is win.
And the most would be ending up in bed with one of them.
It also means I'm watching porn with mario earphones so i can hear. Possibly the best way to mastrabate EVER
ROB LOWE. SO BEAUTIFUL. SO DOUCHEY. SO HARD TO SPELL HIS NAME WHEN DRUNK.
Well, if it makes you feel any better I'll be drinking tequila and doing lines on Halloween. Just like old days.
Sooo does anyone wanna tell me why I threw up a cigarette this morning?
OMG YOU DID TO?!
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