oh my she just said cum sticks to her dentures so when she blows if they let her she takes them out
Do I need to let your sister outside to go pee or anything before I leave?
he used the word "rubber" i just couldn't do it after that.
Bring mistletoe to the strip club, and they feel obligated. they dont even charge you
You guys need to stop introducing me as "the girl you shared"
Oh god. It's my first day here, I'm still drunk and somebody just drifted in a forklift. I'm going to die.
They live so far away from me that not fucking them both would have been financially irresponsible
I literally paid him in shots to clean my entire apartment. he even vacuumed...who said alcoholism is a bad thing??
I think my mom knows im high. It could be because im slow dancing with my cat in the kitchen. The dip and kiss is what gave it away.
She hash-tagged my name. I think it's safe to say that she remembers our hookup.
Is it possible to rally from a drunken seizure?
I just need to stop hanging out with girls who drink wine coolers.
That was so not worth putting pants on for.
WELL I DIDNT KNOW IT WAS POSSIBLE TO COME SO HARD YOU HAVE AN ASTHMA ATTACK BUT HERE I AM
At least your wife cheated on you. Women will feel bad for you. In a month there will boy bands that are jealous of your dick
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