I just watched Juno. I kind of wish I was in highschool and pregnant
She seriously needs to find another hobby other than bouncing on cock.
Its Shannon Doherty lazy not Forest Whittaker lazy
I hope as the only other living being in this apartment you can explain to me why the toilet was full of cheerios this morning.
i have no feeling in my penis or fingers but i think it was worth it
Fell down a spiral staircase. Et tu vodka. Et tu.
I think he just made me trade sex for my cat.
Totally sleeping on a bloodstained mattress tonight. I love life's little adventures.
i want to be friends with one of those mini shredded wheat men.
I have no idea, but there's a bus parked in front of my house and like 6 texts saying im gonna prove my love. this is either really really awesome or really really bad.
The random guy I fucked from craigslist said I had the best smile. I take compliments where i can get them
Also, I guess I made friends with the guy who caught me peeing behind a bush.
Oh yeah, it was definitely the best sex of my life, I just don't think I can fix the kitchen table before my parents get back...
he just asked me that if he was a penguin and I was a penguin if I would fuck him
Making friends with the guy who had alcohol-infused whipped cream was the best decision I made all night.
Randomize
