can you blame him?
i blame him for everything, HE GOT ME PREGNANT
they ran out of cups so I just drank out of a cowbell.
Just heard the new 'We are the world' ... Can I get my 10 bucks for Haiti back?
Something's wrong. My throat is definitely not in it's normal spot. Way too low.
I just need to repress my desire to share my impressive chugging abilities with the world and I won't black out so much
My month off booze swimsuit season diet plan is working well. Plus I'm learning so much about my house, did you know a girl named Meagan lives here?
I think I'm in love. He's everything I ever wanted for myself, just with a lot more drugs.
Shirtless guy staggering down the sidewalk, puking into a Prada shopping bag. Ahhh, the walk of shame in Boystown.
You are going to come home to a suitcase in the fridge. Just go with it.
the liver wants what the liver wants
Did we pole dance in front of my boss last night or was it just me?
He wore the same cologne as my orthodontist so all I could think about was how I hadn't worn my retainer in months
Now I’m honestly wondering if I took this kids virginity
Come home... I’m drinking and playing with knives
come on Dane.. ive been there. im like the female version of you, except with morals
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