it was a shit show
We all have our days. But yours might be on the internet.
I am too high to leave where I am...And they are listening to Stained. This is my living hell.
I just finished washing your number off of my chest. I'm Bryan by the way.
Go for the frenulum. Its like eating a popsicle. They go nuts with that shit.
The reason i havent seen you yet better have huge tits
I just got a msg from someone saved in my phone as "gouiys stAndingg nezxt me not oz". Omh my life.
I miss yesterday.Today's hangover makes yesterday's look like a little girl with blonde ringlets playing hopscotch in the street with a ginger kitten.
Still dying that you shit outside
well that's the third time this semester that I've projectile vomited walking to class in front of dozens of people
But for real though. That weed tastes like the jolly laughter of Santa Claus.
You got stoned and bought $300 worth of pudding. Again! Why do YOU think she left you?
Lmao a dude who just got out of prison said im worth 10 cigarettes in prison...I think that's a compliment
Umm... When he walked in I shot him with my confetti gun... It's a wonder my booty calls even show up.
I really wanted you to make me eggs this afternoon. I even wrote it on my hand to remind myself.
apparently i ended up downloading "thats amore", giving him head, and singing it... all at the same time
Randomize
