zippers are such a cool invention
The size of her hoop earrings are directly related to how much of a slut she is.
walking in back of a girl wearing booty shorts, a halter and a bracelet that says trainwreck. I don't get it. The first day of nice weather and all the whores come out, are they like hibernating bears or something?
You better be watching. There will be a POP quiz. Each correct answer gains you 5 more minutes of the sexual act of your choice
Well, let me tell you, it was the most vivid sex dream I've ever had. More so than the Paris Hilton one I had in 05. And about as weird.
Hospital. He tried giving some kid a stone cold stunner during a real fight.
My sister was crawling her way home and kept asking us to carry her,then she insisted on grabbing at our ankles til she passed out, how was your night?
you tried to fill your inhaler with vodka
she fascinated with the iron the back of the toilet seat. she made me sit in the bathroom with her for a solid 10 minutes while she just stared and laughed at it
Turns out I was the only one drinking. I broke one guy's bed and kicked another in the face. Then when an RA came by I shouted to let him in he's gonna find the vodka anyway. Great night
Why does every bad decision I make wind up having 1000 likes on YouTube?
The cops walked in and cracked up bec he was passed out on the couch in a pink tutu.
you walked onto the street in the middle of the 10K in your thong. it was a whole new kind of expirience.
My 19 year old brother just hooked up with his 45 year old cougar kindergarten teacher. These sorts of situations make me realize why the sorority girls call him Wondercock
Does the term "on fleek" apply to dicks or just eyebrows?
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