Some dude at the gas station right now is buying a 30 rack of beast and a can of cat food. Happy Thanksgiving.
I found those 18 whoppers we bought.
I think it's our patriotic duty to get high and watch the state of the union tonight
Typcal friday morning so far. Puke, shower, commute/puke, coffee, puke, coffee, bagel, good to go. Lunch today?
we are still finding bottels filled with his pee. tom almost drank the one in the frig
I wish a box of wine came w a hose. It'd be so much easier to drink from.
You would be my first round pick for a drinking team
This would be a good time to bring up the fact that my spider-man fork is MIA
You could become Eskimo brothers with my dad. How can you pass that up? You pussy.
It's a "nonproductive" (vocab word) cough. It's like a constant tickle in my throat, like there's a little elf with feathers for feet going Gangnam style on my "uvula" (vocab word).
Lets watch game of thrones and have sex every time someone is naked. It'll be like a drinking game but better.
He's passed out. He nodded his head when I asked if he's alive though...so there's that
Please tell me I was just dreaming when I asked if I could borrow your jesus dildo
So! As of five minutes ago I've officially masturbated in every room in my apartment
Dude, I helped you move in yesterday...
I would let him fuck me right here in this laundromat. Praise Satan.
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