I love you
are you drunk
yes but I def love you, we should get married
But I'm Jewish
embrace Jesus
I wish we never smoked. I'm literally laying in bed opening and closing my eyes, just hoping a hot dog stand will appear in the room.
and you wish you could be eating a cookie right now. but all you get to eat is a penis
she got into med school, i feel dumb for banging her dance major friend
You got cut off after you tried to make the dog funnel moscato.
Yea idk it was like early in the morning and you were walking around with no shoes carrying a printer
Also, any YOLOwl-related sex photos will result in you winning ten orgasms, courtesy of myself, as well as sweets and bacon-based dinner. All entrants welcome
Will it make you feel better if we wear the title of dysfunctional fucking roommates? It requires monogamy unless we want to bang someone together.
It's fine. I wouldn't trust either of them to be my workplace drug buddy.
Last night someone asked you what your favorite color was and you said "bagel."
like i got into his car and the beatles were playing. this kid is def getting his dick sucked
I still think he’s a fuckboy but he’s nice to me when I’m over.\nLike sets alarms for me in the morning and always makes sure I cum.
HE WAS CUMMING IN THAT DICK PIC
my grocery list today consisted of condoms. and butter.
umm... whats the butter for?
You walked right into the door. Even the door guy and security guys were laughing.
Randomize
