i saw the 3rd guy i ever had sex with last night and kept calling him #3
Forgot that I saved my paper as "Eat Shit Edwards" and e-mailed it because I missed class. I'm sure Prof. Edwards will be delighted when she gets it. I don't anticipate a passing grade.
the cop didnt laugh with me when he patted me down and pulled out my flask.
dude. you ripped the mardi gras beads off the girls neck and yelled she didnt deserve them..
Potato salad is not cupcake ingredient
You rode him down the last flight of stairs like a human sled.
On that note I give you a 10 for sticking the landing and staying on the whole ride.
If you ever bitch out on 72oz margarita night again, this friendship is over
Well at least you learned that cops don't like when you call them frenchy. Nice dive over the fence by the way.
I'm in Starbucks carrying the boxes wine and the hubcap. So many judging looks.
Alls I remember is making out with that chick.
Nope that was a dude
you were crying saying "if you love me you will find me a loaf of bread"
Everyone is speaking Spanish and this 300 hundred pound chick is talking about the time she got out of prison... Fuck this place
He sat next to me, put his arm around me, yelled at his girlfriend that he was breaking up with her, and told me I'm his little pet for the night.
he's not even weird he's been offering me different drinks all night
oh i remember now hes the guy that liked when i peed on him
The only food I have to eat is weed gummies and magic mushrooms... This is peak 34
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