he actually used the line "do you have a map, because i'm lost in your eyes" and i was to drunk to care
the ceiling is raining jello shotss
I have officially had sex in every room on my floor. Don't say I'm not an amazing RA.
woke up wearing a canadian flag with the starting forward of the hockey team. i feel oddly patriotic
Are we talking about who knows if I'll get naked pictures of you with a broadsword or who knows if I'll be surprised?
you walked onto the street in the middle of the 10K in your thong. it was a whole new kind of expirience.
My aunt comes over, haven't seen her in 4 years. First thing, looks me up and down and goes "...yup, that pair ripened nicely. Theyll get you some free drinks"
I think you were raised by the wrong sister
it's ok, no one ever died fom being sticky.
i've gotta research that and get back to you.
i think my cat just said my name.
Happy Halloween!! Last Halloween we spent together you got brought home in a shopping cart
My v day was great. There's a cum stain in the shape of a handprint on my sheets
FUCK YOU IM DRINKING WINE FROM A BOX
You okay there or need a ride? Maybe a straw for your box
Maybe a straw...
We should get drunk in walmart
when?
20 minutes ago
Who fucking spams baby shark at a sports bar
Well, we went shopping. He bought me starbucks and ate me out in the change room at target. If that isnt the best post covid first date, I don't know what is
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