If I had a motorized wheelchair, I'd just chase the squirrels on campus all day.
I've now graduated to the level of gay where I can tell Tegan and Sara apart.
You're barking up the wrong lesbian.
how do you feel about lunch break shots ?
I brought his matress to the living room we're laying on it listening to rick james drinking vodka
Dude, its flawless. what could go wrong?
Jail. That could go wrong.
could you clean the juice and feathers off my bed I'm just not up for hangover cleaning.
Well anything after a French guy would have been a disappointment. But I'm fairly certain he was just trying to masturbate into me.
you have a wonderful penis attached to someone I'm having a lot of problems with right now
I think I'm in love. He's everything I ever wanted for myself, just with a lot more drugs.
Ahh, 151. Think of it this way: it took one shot to get you buzzed, I took eight. I may or may not have broken a tv with my skull that night and met someone's parents naked and hungover the next morning.
Omg you can't vacuum salsa that's just ridiculous
As long as you keep bringing fries home, i'll keep being naked when you get home
Just drink your champagne out of a trophy like a fuckin winner
He stopped me mid blowjob and asked me to take off my hat. He said it made him feel like Neil Young was going down on him.
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