god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
she said i have a nice penis, i told her only bob saget and god could judge that.
all the douches that like ed hardy are the same douches that were obsessed with lisa frank
The guy I was getting with last night took off his purity ring mid-sex and threw it across the room.
the teacher just ate a hash brownie and passed out on the bus best field trip 2010'
gave you a haircut while you slept. Please don't kill me.
The way I see it, everyone on campus has a fake, but I'm the only person who actually makes beer in their dorm.
Your whole purpose in life is to just float around and satisfy lonely women and also join lesbian couples in threesomes.
Guess what I signed up for?!?!?!
Please tell me you're not selling your eggs.
Banana suit guy has an entourage and they're all douchebags. There is no god.
Last night apparently I said "I need a break" and then I just passed the fuck out for 3 hours
Are we at that point yet where I can just say "I want you to sit on my face"? If not, want to go out for "drinks"?
In 18 months of being married we've had sex with 7 different couples. Who said you can't have your cake and eat it.
Every time our eyes meet, I silently summon him to my vagina.
You proposed a left ass cheek firmness contest and got a surprising number of contestants. Then you ruined it by groping someone who wasn't playing and awarding them first place.
Randomize
