he thinks he's going to hurt your feelings
He can't hurt my feelings
I don't have feelings.
How'd it feel making her break her religion?
Sometimes, in the course of human events, people get lit on fire.
I can't get a boner in the bathroom of a buffet.
i've never smoked before...when you said wake and bake i thought you meant like a funeral bbq or something
Are you available to help carry me into the house Monday?
She apparently grabbed another girl and pulled her into the shower fully clothed. When the girl was like "you need to stop" she curled up into a ball and refused to leave.
Whoa, you know how to pick em.
she's sniffed three people's necks on the bus to see who the good smell was coming from...
she's gonna get diseases
It's raining beautiful colors and I don't know what the fuck is going on
I just traded 5 cigarettes for a sandwich on they greyhound.You owe me 5 cigarettes. I told you I would get hungry.
So basically I really like drugs AND banging cops and it's starting to get complicated
he just ran into my room in his giant penis costume yelling "supercock to the rescue"... I am still in total shock
Any man who can do squats while fucking you is a man worth keeping.
New rule. If he's too busy to put the "H" in "what" then I'm too busy to put his D in me.
Fuck him and his perfect arms, huge penis and relentless ability to ignore me.
Randomize
