the best thing about tacos is after you shit them all out you feel like to have room for your dignity to come back
Deadliest Catch is NOT foreplay
you announced to the whole room that instead of shaving you were planning to start straightening and then braiding your pubes. awkward silence followed by everyone leaving.
just woke up in a hotel room.. realizing its the hotel i work at.. lets see how this walk of shame turns out
people are starting to question the shark bite story
I had sex with her because I didn't want to hurt her feelings.. You're the one who told me I should be more sensitive.
Do you know many girls there are in gay bars waiting for me to do coke off their tits? A lot.
Wait til she sees the pic of her vag in court docs.
It'll be like a meth lab. But with jello.
There's a treasure map on your stomach. Treasure may or may not be the clothes you lost...enjoy
Best thing she said after I kicked her out "rugby guys have single handedly ruined my faith in men"
He said we were over, wrote my name on the condom he left in my car last night and said he'd always keep it in case I came back. It was kind of romantic
She told me I was absolutely not allowed to sleep with him even though she knows I'm a rule breaker who loves a good challenge.
I gave in, made out with her, and long story short, I'm giving hetero another try.
He's the first boyfriend I wouldn't cheat on. This is a really big deal for me
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