scale of 1-10 how well do I give head
5, but i have never had a 10. best was an 8 so if i grade you on a curve you are a 7. ish.
So his roomate was eating breakfast when I was sneaking out. He's the guy I took home from jessicas wedding. I ended up eating coco puffs with him
Just another sign I need to get out of this town
It's happening again. I feel like I'm under water and my heart beat matches "Teenage Wasteland"
What's the wine called that we really like and we usually drink it with xanax?
Sometimes I look at the people in school that are obviously very diligent and on top of their studies, and then I wonder why they don't smoke weed.
Euphemism? No, "pantsless vodka yoga" is a legitimate pastime of mine
I apparently started to text you last night. All it said was 'the whole clam'. I hope that means something to you.
I don't know which part of you thought this was funny but it's fucked up to wake up in that much fluff and now we don't have a couch. Fuck you.
My last google search of the night was "Things that cost $102.50"
I just watched a guy smoke weed through a French Horn. He is my hero
Perhaps if I didn't mortify my parents last night with my drunken obnoxious behavior which resulted in the casualty of an entire decorative bathroom shelf which I completely ripped off the wall and left for dead, I would be more than willing to go day drinking.
I agree though, his intact virginity is truly the tragedy of the century.
A fair warning: I don't think a cop will let you off the hook just because your birthday is on New Year's Eve
Can you tell dad to stop liking and sharing porn on FB again?
Mike fell asleep with his hand down my pants. I'm clearly an enticing person.
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