My clean wipe streak was ended today by two enchiladas and a can of refried beans. dammit i should have been more cautious. thanks for all ur encouragement and support.
remember them days when you seriously wanted your mom to marry rev run and we would always talk shit about justine?
joeyyyy why you always taken cheeseburgers from me?!?!?!
He seems like he has feelings, which is completely unacceptable; esp for a boy in college.
Her parents came home early, i had to hug her mom with a condom on...
I just masturbated mid-day, thinking of you
I think that is one of the most romantic things I have ever heard from a fuck buddy on v-day, there is a strong possibility that you will soon be my girlfriend.
the realtor just took us to a house I had a one night stand in. I feel like it's a sign.
You did profess your love for cotton multiple times and your hatred for all other fabrics
Either you got hacked or we need to have a serious discussion about sending penis enlargement emails to your straight friends and why you shouldn't. It sends the wrong message.
I was just doing the math on how much beer we need for the houseboat. in doing so, I came to the conclusion that we need to open a beer distributor business.
I just figured out the time exactly by how many shots and beers that I've had since this morning. I either have a terrible problem, or a great solution.
Also, it was so cold in that bathroom that I saw my crap steaming, a first in my life
Just got hit on via LinkedIn..do I capitalize on this opportunity/land a job or reply something sassy
I need to stop challenging people to taking off clothes. I win too often
So i woke up on a park bench... Using my shoe as a pillow, cuddling a empty handle of vodka... Yet I'm still in my living room. Someone please tell me why all my vodkas gone? I'll deal with the park bench situation at a later time.
It's okay to admit that you're into redheads.
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