How crunk are you?
I'm a Tom Selleck. Zero being Tipper Gore and max being the Bush twins
After going down on me he either said "there, it's over" or "there's an odor"... I couldn't hear him and was too embarrassed to ask him to repeat himself. I just got dressed, grabbed my bag, and left. So I don't think there's gunna be a second date. =(
Sitting in class thinking wow im glad im not hungover...and then i realized im still drunk.
I love college. Only here at ten in the morning can you hear "Man, hot sauce on my pussy was my worst idea in a long time." while walking down the hall.
Reason #1 for no sex outdoors: Mosquito bites. Awkward, awkward mosquito bites.
To tired for the bar. Came home and drank wine out of the bottle. Kind of don't want to know what that says about my life.
We got a kitchen table so we would eat together more. So far we've played drunken monopoly and had sex on it.
I'm drunk in a place called Lick-A-Chick. PS. It's not a lesbian hot spot, they sell chicken.
So everything was good he was big spoon I was little spoon and then I got peed on
Is it weird that i want a guy to ask me to homecoming by spelling it out in meatballs?
THATS VERY WEIRD
Why is "Oprah of drinks" written on my arms?
You said to write it on you, after you kept saying, "You get a drink, you get a drink, everyone gets a drink."
The assignment was about the Industrial Revolution so I just screamed at them in a British accent all day. No, they didn't know I was hungover.
Just bought plan b at 8am. Then the cashier asked if I wanted to donate to the children's miracle network. Fml
I'm gonna go take a shower so I can cleanly change into my drinking underwear.
Don’t get me wrong—I love silver and bracelets—but handcuffs are not a good look on me…
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