Just spent the rest of my time at that bar trying to keep a probs underage closet gay from touching my kitten to prove he still likes girls.
This is how I know I have no life... Jon and Kate are my emotional roller coaster.
As a driver I hate pedestrians, and as a pedestrian I hate drivers, but no matter what the mode of transportation, I always hate cyclists.
Everything about him screamed your future.
I just had a flashback to last nights party, I'm pretty sure I told most of the people there that I post a masturbation schedule for an iCal download.
He shaved off his eyebrows. This is not my life.
i pretended i was deaf and got a girl to come home with me
Don't talk to me about lonely until you're eating marshmallows for dinner in your underwear watching House of Cards for 12 hours straight. I hate all you couples
So last night took an interesting turn.. Never thought I'd say I had to pick up my glasses off the floor of a strip club
Hypothetically speaking, when I get a sugar glider would it be frowned upon to bring it Ito classes with me in m pocket?
2015 is a year for health and mental stability and alas we are not yet there so yolo
OMG I accidentally abducted a cat. Now there is a cat in my apartment. I NEED TO UNDO WHAT I HAVE DONE
He made me promise not to describe his penis in detail to you....oops.
On a scale of one to 10 how Risky is it to sleep with a married man (all morals set aside)
Sorry. Im too sleepy to penis.
Randomize
