Does it still count as a "walk of shame" if it's only 1am?
I just read the lonely terrorist on nwa had 40 more friends than me on facebook
This girl is drinking wine and watching grey's anatomy in the library during finals week. I hate comm majors.
FULL ON LADY WOOD. YOU CAN SEE THE VEIN
I got carried out by security last night. AND the taxi had to drive up onto the sidewalk to get me i was that drunk.
Woke her up in the middle of the night with the smell from a fart. So proud of my colon.
My brother just text me asking if I was ready for the blowjob of my life.
It's rum buckets o'clock
There's a kid in the back of the class drinking out of a flask. Like what is going on?
NOW HE'S DRINKING OUT OF A HANDLE. WHO IS THIS KID?
Watching Rudolph while stoned is practically a religious experience.
I just said "I love my cat" as a hobby.
Today's goals: get day drunk then sober up in time for the walking dead tonight.
Well I want to be mistreated and called a slut and finger banged
But I guess hugs would be nice
WHY IS THERE A GOLD FISH IN MY BONG??
I CAN'T FALL IN LOVE WITH SOMEONE WHO HAS A LISP. I JUST CAN'T.
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