all I know is if I don't watch spice world right now there will be a firefight.
So the last day on the vacation I woke up in the bath tub. My mom said she asked me during the night what I was doing and I said, "swimming."
and those juicy C cups turned out to be oddly-shaped A's when her padded bra came off.
Dude I just heard my boss singing from the bathroom "I love making poop"
There is a girl in bio drinking beer out of a starbucks cup with a straw
This gyro tastes like lonliness
Please tell me nicole sent the picture of the ejaculating penis to you too, otherwise I'll feel really awkward
He said he was going to "rock my world". I wonder if he too has a false sense of confidence and accomplishment stemming from a complete lack of honesty from our own female counterparts.
not much just sitting outside his bathroom door naked eating cheetoes. You?
I got called a drunken housewife today in class. I'm proud, not many people can say they've achieved their life goals like I have by the time they turn 20
For our 1st date, he tried to schedule a rock climbing. I suggested, "how about we meet at my place and you can scale Mt. Vagina?"
I stopped his blowjob to raise 3 fingers & whistle the hunger games tune to the people walking past the window
I took a dab in Denver and was I. Rocky Mountain national park almost to Wyoming before I realized I missed my turn.
I was on top for a full on make out when in dead silence "I'm moaning Myrtle" came from the TV. Moment ruined. I got cock blocked by a fictional ghost
Finding my pants in the morning should not make me this proud
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