After last night I still want u
But please keep that on the DL
I love you
are you drunk
yes but I def love you, we should get married
But I'm Jewish
embrace Jesus
check it out our google latitudes are spooning
Is there a tactful way for me to ask a girl to let me know when she gets her period?
I swear I have "I love assholes" written on my forehead with ink that only guys can see.
i called him pencil dick in front of over half of his fraternity brothers...
...never gotten so many high fives in my life! fuck ya i win!
The new google images is a smorgasbord of porn now are plans for tonight are off.
We should probably avoid doing this again, but hey it was a nice one time thing to tell the grandkids about... Hopefully they don't end up being YOUR grandkids.
My grandmother cheats at beer pong and has been rubbing her tainted victory in my face for an hour now.
I think I've had 45 beers today though So things are looking up.
I can't drink with the moms anymore. All they talk about is lactating.
Circle jerk is a real thing. It looks like five innocent virgins in a closet at my brother's bar mitzvah. Yeah, I walked in on that.
Remind me in the morning that I've now seen a guy do crack. That actually happened. I'm at the wrong party.
No, not if I told them not to. they listen to me. I have a vagina.
He hit me with his bagpipe
Isnt that against the lesbian handbook?
Randomize
