i was looking up hair salons in ithaca for the wedding and one is a hair salon/ sake bar! you can have sake or champagne while you get your hair done!
question, how would one sake-bomb while getting hair done without getting a horrible haircut?
i'm sorry if your life is a sore subject
you're dressed like that and you're on the rag, that's false advertisment
I wonder if u can grow weed on Framville and sell it to Mafia Wars?
there was enough confetti in my bra to throw another NYE party
it's too soon in the relationship to think about him when i masturbate. so i think about his dad instead.
Its 6:30 and I'm shotguning a busch ice while taking a shit. Outlook for work today: interesting
How do I tell my child he was conceived on a barstool in South Alabama?
Her rack rivals that of the deer I shot last season. You need to get after that.
You threw your body across the gross couple hooking up on the couch and demanded they scratch your back. I love you drunk on peach schnapps
Are you seriously getting this frustrated over a hand-job right now?
She acted like falling "up" the stairs was a fucking physics phenomenon. I call that Tuesday nights.
We ended the night eating peanutbutter with our hands and smoking cigarettes in the house at 4am. Fucking Everclear, man.
Oh, the accent alone guaranteed a bj. It was when he started drunkenly singing in PERFECT PITCH that I knew I was fucking him.
Apparently i disappeared and no one found me until the morning , but i have fifty missed calls
Randomize
