Do you think Capital One would let me put the Tub Girl picture on my Capital One card?
Beat you to it.
someone needs to make a hangover cure that isn't cocaine.
I am a terrible person. This is almost as bad as when I was going to see my ex while my boyfriend was at that funeral.
The best part of last night was the women's softball game on the TV at the strip club
Oh thank the gods of upholstery, i thought that was never coming out...
It's hard to be judgmental of others when you are wearing silver pleather.
well they never fully had sex so she's like an eskimo step-sister. I'll make a family tree for you.
Sometimes I actually rage on Tuesday, come back, and do homework drunk and pull an all nighter.
She went outside in nothing but her panties and came back inside 15 minutes later wearing a different pair of panties.
He started yelling "you tha man!" while I was reverse cowgirl
I know you like got hit by a car but do you want to come to my birthday pardi
he's so hot I'd consider breaking the whole, "till death do us part," agreement he's currently in
I woke up in the bathroom clutching a stuffed shark. My night was fantastic, thanks for asking.
the last thing is remember is that strange guy in the leotard...i woke up in my bed, naked, with a half eaten grilled cheese on my nightstand, a six pack in the fridge, a new pack of cigarettes on my pillow and coke in my purse. apparently i bought some drugs, shopped and cooked. typical.
I have no idea, I usually just project my awkwardness out like a mating call until it draws other awkward members of the opposite sex out from the bushes
Randomize
