Is that you in the white hat?
Fine suit yourself
My booty call said shes done doing the walk of shame. Wtf is that?
It's what anyone that sleeps with you, specifically, does when they leave. Some do it even when they just think of you.
I have "you made mistakes last night" written alllll over me.
you know its summer when you wake up on the toilet
She sucks dick like Beethoven on piano, but talking to her is like Simple Jack in Tropic Thunder. Still working out the pros vs cons list.
I'm sure he'll make the rejection quick and completely justified.
So yeah, turns out I enjoy vaguely public group sex. Who knew?
I think if I send him enough nudes, he will buy my plane ticket.
i was so unappreciative the bar was giving out sweatbands UNTIL I casually used it during sex.
I'm not getting off this floor. I love this floor
what is considered shitting yourself?
Like my underwear wasn't soiled, but there was definitely a departure from my asshole.
1) Woke up alone with my bathing suit on inside out spooning an empty bottle of Jack, 2) get the fuck on to my level 3) please pick me up and bring a stuffed pony, some Oreo's and my pride...
I keep track of what day of the week it is by my recent destinations on my nav system. \nRight now it's: booty call, bar, booty call, brunch, bar, church so that must mean we are getting close to Sunday when we start the rotation all over again.
Waking up naked and dehydrated has become a regular occupancy for me.
His dick is social distance approved
Social distance approved?
big enough for me to fuck from six feet away
Randomize
