love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
there's a booger on my laptop, i suspect it's yours
i killed an earwig and left its corpse on the wall as a warning
Apparently I called 911 everytime Sean Kingston told me to
you need to leave class get on facebook and start untagging IMMEDIATELY
she gave me a handjob in the middle of the night and my stomach growled so she walked out totally naked and came back 5 minutes later with two sandwiches. who the fuck says getting married is awful?
is it bad that I didn't wash the cum out of my hair because it keeps my curls intact?
i love that youre following in my footsteps.. pissing yourself on your birthday is an honor and a privlege
To my wonderful winter break booty calls: thank you for making this holiday season enjoyable. I look forward to seeing you boys again this summer.
He broke hus nose arm jousting with the traffic cones... We need to make head shots illegal or get helmets or something
I don't know what possessed you to do that, but you have to give the stripper more money before you try to check her oil or they are going to throw us out every time you do that.
I texted him in the morning wishing him a day as spectacular as his dick was.
Bro, she said she wanteo to fuck me with my white Nike cap on so I resemble a douchebag. I think my choice of women might be coming into question
How do you say happy birthday to someone you fuck occasionally that almost got you arrested? Like what do I text.
Don't worry about it too much, but I just committed us to possibly raising a kid
Randomize
