It was just pointed out to me in a meeting that there is a lipstick stain on my crotch.
Prereq for being on nyc prep: money, bitchy, and a lazy eye... if only you were rich
Blew in her face. She is Pissed. Yahtzee. As she brushes her teeth.
My doc was like ur only supposed to have 6 sexual partners..thats just one semester at college
just found a sign outside my brothers door "not going to church, don't even try" and he is covered is vomit in his bed.
we hooked up on one of my student's desks last night...i can't decide if i'm ashamed or massively proud of myself
dude you teach first grade wtf
he has been on a 2 week bender, has been homeless for a week and a half, and leaves for madagascar in 2 days. Do we worry or is that normal?
Yeah, she tried to drown her but then they hooked up.
I have now slept with people from more countries than Ive actually visited. Can we make this a game somehow? Like foreign fuck buddy bingo?
As long as you're naked and covered in glow paint, I'm there.
I have a very hazy flashback of me making out with a guy in a seashell bra??! Can you confirm or deny
I had 5 long islands and 2 alien brain hemorrhages…I am entirely certain that the "power hour to finish the night" idea was just too much.
Dear slutty diary: I lied about feeling guilty of being a homewrecker in order to have more sex. it worked.
But for real though. That weed tastes like the jolly laughter of Santa Claus.
I mean my dick does have feeling again, which is a step in the right direction
Randomize