If I were a hot girl. I'd whore around, I'd be awesome.
shes trying to light up her bowl in front of the fan. everytime it blows it out she just gives it a dirty look.
I misunderstood what a threesome is. Please come pick me up.
of course he's cheating on me, she's 100x prettier and she can do the splits
Finally put clothes on I've been laying naked in the bed for approximately 4 hours since I showered and by showered I mean when I laid down in the bathtub with the shower on
Btw, just wanna point out that you've hooked up with two guys whose birthdays are today. Congratulations, you have a type!
All i remember about last night is holding a bottle of bacardi and screaming challenge accepted!
I'm pretty sure they kept making references about gangbanging me but I was too stoned to catch on, I just sat there and stared at his kitten.
Someone with the Instagram name "hymenbreaker" just liked a photo of me and my grandma. I feel ashamed.
When we were finished I asked him how long it had been since he'd cum that hard. He thought really hard for a while before telling me his brain forgot how years worked.
Well my sober pact lasted almost an hour. Then I did four shots. But in other news, one of those shots I took with a midget. So like I couldn't turn that shit down.
party tonight. bring as many traffic cones as you can find. we need to section off the blackout drunks way better this time
We are making a pool on how long he stays sober this time you want in?
I am going to paint butt plugs like little Christmas trees and give them as gifts.
You could paint cock rings as wreaths.
I just bartered a blowjob for the ex-fiancée's engagement ring. FTW!
Randomize
