The 3 of us think it's time to start drinking.
3?
Me, myself and I
party was madd awkward.. it was like every person who i sat next to in high school and never said hi to was there
As long as they suck a good dick I don't care what fruit they have and where they have it
hahaha our party bus just died on the freeway and we're drinking in the center divider. i'm on the roof. i win
You can't like Harry Potter and Twilight. You have to pick. Vampires and Wizards are mutually exclusive.
I spent my night drunkenly staring at a picture of John Stamos. How do you think I feel?
i wish i was a boy too so i knew what a blow job felt like
i mean, i stole her boyfriend and beat her snake score on facebook within 48 hours. not her week.
Gotcha. Well, I'm puking and trying to keep down water from a mug that says "love the moment" around the rim. Not loving this particular moment.
I'm just gonna use that pot butter as dip for chips. That's fat, American AND stoner!
My ex's new girlfriends ex boyfriend is getting me my nipples pierced for Valentine's Day so who's the real winner here
It's 4/20 and I spent the morning in the gym and am working later tonight. I don't even have any weed. Why am I adult-ing again?
The stripper started talking about murdering people....that lapdance turned dark.....
My party ended early and I have a mountain of shrimp and weed
I just bought a bottle of dried bees on Etsy. I am the wrong person to talk you out of this.
Randomize
