Are you drinking alone?
no, i'm watching house
That doesn't count.
wtf, then i'm always alone
I just woke up under a kitchen table with my sandals taped to my feet and a corona bottle taped to my hand..
Now that I'm 21, I feel like I'm letting North Dakota down by not being drunk everyday
Please, do not let 'babydaddy' catch on as your petname for me.
thanks for showing me a good time......and your penis a few times. Thanks especially for that.
Do something fun then. Blow up the house or whatever.
How have you survived this long?
Dumb luck and a deal with the devil.
I wish I could just hang out in ERs.
I'm not entirely sure what happened last night, but I think I dislocated my kneecap during an epic Mario Kart battle...
Y'all best leave this "I can only have a couple drinks" shit at the door. U don't drive to Yukon to have a shot. I'm getting u fuckers drunk.
Couldn't find my swimsuit top anywhere this morning but finally found it in the skimmer of the pool so thats how my night apparently went
grandma made pot brownies .. oh god bless us everyone
Was Mr. ROBOT good? I missed it. I just fucked dental hygienist on the trampoline in my backyard
He started yelling terms of endearment at a cheese sandwich. Then he tried to hump it.
he just fucked me for my cheese..
I made out with a 40 year old and told her we were dating then got kicked out of a gay bar. This is the day I stop drinking.
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