I'm drinking till I'm someone else's problem
Ryan Ross and Jon Walker left panic at the disco today.
I predict a mass suicide of the 14 year old girl population...
I wish there was some sort of "recently added" function for blackberrys so i could see what random numbers i got from the night before
Call me pathetic, but saying "tits for ireland" is working out really well on chatroulette today.
remember that response paper i wrote naked, at 745am still drunk with a naked dude in my bed? yeah, totally got an a- on that. and he loved my insight.
Well I'm 85-90% sure that he licked syrup off my body, but no guarantees...
if it doesnt flame it aint got game is a bad drinking motto eyebrow-wise.
eyebrows regrow, your balls dont
I feel like there is something fundamentally wrong with me as a woman. My initial text to you was "What's up, fuck bucket?"
Are you good with a knife? I need someone to perform amateur surgery.
So besides your brother walking in on you shaving and singing "I'm gonna get asssss" how was your night
it went well until I said "me" instead of "my" and he kept sexting me in character as a pirate
Did we do drunk science last night? There's tequila in the test tubes...
I just texted him from the other room to come have sex with me-stress relieved
You are such a millennial
Considering I drank for you last night, do you mind picking up your half of the hangover
I texted him: “Come over for the Super Bowl. I promise lots of scoring.”
My divorce is turning into a porn script
Randomize
