Just mADE A PArabola og urine
Ikea night.
?
Insert tab A into swedish slot B
An ad on my facebook says "don't be THAT girl". Its like it knows.
I'm basically sure i was the reason for glitter on his penis
I just want you to know the floor between our rooms isnt sound proof "Captain Cock"
Totally about to meet up with Ryan in an empty parking lot. Expect to fuck him. Yes I know it's 3am. Slutty? Possibly. Excited? Damn right.
he just told me i make him happier than drugs. that's some serious shit right there
Do you think royal wedding drunk calls for wine or tequila?
at that time a 4 pound meatball stuffed with pizza rolls seemed more important than bailing you out of jail.... sorry.
Just realized how sopa could affect my ability to watch porn, son of a bitch
QUIT RUINING DICK PICTURE DAY
In the ER with Chelz, I may have broken her ankle during sex. Lovely.
Your favorite boobs are sending you seasons greetings
Don't mind me, I'm just walking 2 miles across campus with no jacket, covered in highlighter, and carrying a hair extension. Gotta love miami!
I'm going to get him a gold star sticker and put it on his dick
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