Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
My gyno actually laughed when I told her about his penis size.
Can you return condoms to CVS?
Only if you return your pride as well.
I went for the touchdown every play, and I think I ended up with herpes.
Just did the walk of shame across state lines...milestone?
there was already a condom in her . . and it was bigger than me
On the back of that comment, I've formed a theory that as a result of my brainwashing your drunk self actually believes that beards are your calling.
I was just at home taking Vicodin for a week straight. Talk about a vacation.
I think your dad took our porno
I can't help that I bring out the sex in people
So yeah, turns out I enjoy vaguely public group sex. Who knew?
Is this really the life I've chosen for myself?
Well I've consulted some psychics but they keep saying all they hear in my head is screaming and all they see in my future is pool noodles and cheese dip?
You know when your cat drags a dead bird into the the house as a present and drops it at your feet looking all pleased because it thinks you'll be pleased? That's what sex with him was like.
Nate is still in lock up because when the cop informed me he'd shit his pants in the squad car I declined to post bail.
Randomize
