Where you are. You must stay where you are are
Where you are. You must stay where you are arewhere are youu
Where you are. You must stay where you 5eare wher are you!!
They had miseltoe over the keg.... thats cheating
i just looked at the calendar to see when spring break is and literally stopped eating
I couldn't accept the bj. My penis has done nothing wrong and didn't deserve the punishment of her face.
His bookmark is a piece of toilet paper. No shame there.
You crossed every boundary on the boundary spectrum last night. You're like the illegal immigrant of drunk actions. No more holiday drinking for you.
Malibu has added tequila to its rum. It's like when two beautiful gaybies come together an spawn a unicorn that only cries jellybean tears.
I'm sorry I peed on your everything.
Thats like me asking what you think of antisocial polish guys with mysterious rashes
I got Pilsbury cinnamon rolls for us to have tomorrow, but I don't have the willpower to leave them in my fridge overnight, so I am eating them all and getting us more in the morning
I love you more by the minute
She told me her last name, which as you know is my #1 turn-off.
Did this whole conversation happen while you were shitting?
FYI, his "son" is a Chihuahua.
I'll be wearing lingerie and holding a bottle of bourbon so pick up whatever food you think goes with that
I guarantee you he will only fuck with old bitches from now on
Randomize
